Baby: 3-6 months: 6-9 months: More weaning

Okay maybe not once a week. But at least everyone I'm talking to will understand the pressure and how little time you have as your baby gets older. Once you get to 6m, you've really got into the swing of things and established your own routines, so maybe you won't need advice as much any more...

• Don't get too focused on your routines. Things happen and you may not be able to stick to it one night, it will be okay. Similarly, don't expect your routines to be static. It should be the same day to day, but fluid over months. keep trying things every so often. My baby hated her baths, so we did them in the morning to wake her up instead of at night to calm her. Now she's got more used to them and can have them at night, and quite enjoys to splash. 

Weaning (again)

Since my last blog post I have come to realise the wonder that is food pouches. I will still suggest that you home cook your baby most food, but what's been amazing about the pouches for me, is that you can give her her meal, and she still looks hungry but she doesn't need another whole portion. You can actually squeeze the pouches out onto the spoon and give her it one spoonful at a time, instead of pouring out a portion and wasting most of it.

But my baby won't stop eating, what do I do?

You're not giving her enough water. (s)he will keep eating and eating until she gets the moisture from the food as well. We actually forgot to give our baby water with meals when she first started eating, and had this problem. You should definately try giving more water. It also depends how moist the food is, as to how often you would offer your baby her sippy cup. Fruit dishes are rather moist, and (s)he may not need as much water. Butterbean casserole (which my baby loves) is a bit of a halfway point, where I would offer water every three spoonfuls or so. Red Lentils and Spinach (which my baby hates) is very dry and you need to offer the water after EVERY spoon, (s)he might not take it every time, but probably most of the time. If you have meals that you give your baby regularly (or made a huge batch of and froze) you will get to know how often to offer her water. 

My baby won't eat, what do I do?

Offer water. Sometimes, if the food is too dry, your baby will refuse to have another spoon until (s)he has had a drink. Babies can be amazingly good at knowing what they want. (s)he could also genuinely not like it. Don't be disheartened. Try and "make" her have some, there have been a few times that my baby has refused to eat something she didn't like the smell of, then when I got it in her mouth she liked it. Bait and switch, offer her a bottle or sippy cup, and when (s)he opens her mouth get it in there. 3 spoonfuls is a good place to be. If (s)he has had three spoonfuls and still won't open her mouth for it, (s)he's not going to have that dish today. Throw away any of it that was heated, or that touched her spoon and mouth (germs) but the rest could go back in the fridge and try tomorrow. If you have many portions of it, freeze them and try it again in a couple of weeks. Tastes change and (s)he may enjoy it later. Almost all food can be frozen for a month and some even beyond that. Defrost thoroughly, but you don't have to warm it. It is whatever your baby prefers. Room temperature is fine, and you won't have to throw it all away if (s)he won't eat it.

My baby won't drink water, what do I do?

Persevere. They HAVE to learn to drink water. Do not give them juice all the time. They should get used to water as their main drink, and juice is a treat. To try and encourage your baby to drink water if they simply won't, you can offer the sweet water that you may have cooked her some apples or pears in. Get rid of the bits, and make sure it's cooled, but (s)he can have it as a drink. You can also add a few drops of pure fruit juice to her water.
It could also be her cup. Never give juice in a bottle, but you could try to give her water in a bottle, or try a different cup. Hard plastic sippy cups, like hard spoons, may be rough on sensitive teething gums. Nuby do a weird sippy cup that is sort of a cross between a bottle and a sippy cup, with a silicone spout. My baby really likes that cup.

Go with what you think is best for weaning, but they really can have practically anything from 6m. I have even been told by a health professional that once in a blue moon, you could blend up a curry with lots of rice...don't follow anyone's advice blindly, if you think giving a seven month old baby curry is stupid, don't do it. There are lots of tables and charts out there that tell you when your baby can have this or that, look them up if you want, but there isn't much (s)he can't have.

Thing's I didn't realize a 6m old baby can have:-

Peanut butter

Bell Pepper

Meats

My new health visitor says that basically you only need to avoid sugar, salt, and honey, but I read somewhere they're not allowed fish until 9m...If you're unsure of something, ask around or look it up, but most "normal" foods are fine. For example: I have no idea if a 6m old can have haggis.

Chocolate.

I see no reason to give your baby chocolate. I know there's pots of chocolate custard and things out there, but why would you WANT to give your child that sugar rush at this age? Surely they would be all over the place. I KNOW you want them to experience the joy that is chocolate, me too, but I would think it's best to wait. I don't know when until, but probably after food has been established as a 3 meal a day occurrence. If you want to give your baby a sweet treat, fruit is healthy, and naturally sweet. Strawberries, mango, banana...all foods that my baby gets VERY excited for.

They say to get your baby used to the things you eat, but I'm not so sure about that. You want your baby to grow up healthy and strong, so make sure you add lots of greens to whatever they have. Our main meals are nice easy cottage and shepherd's pies, lasagne's and spaghetti bolognaises, broken up with some fish and chips or chicken and chips. Giving our baby nothing but what we eat would have been BAD for her. Make sure you give your baby lots of variety. You should really get involved and have fun, it's already starting to make us eat healthier! Try new things WITH your baby, chickpeas, butter beans, celery, parsley, carrots and apples are all things seem to be in every baby recipe! Parsley is especially great. You can add it to anything. Fresh is best. Add it to the water you cook things in, add it to your mash. It's healthy, and different colours are fun for baby. 

Poop

During weaning, all poop is good poop except no poop. If it's a funny colour, think what your baby has eaten. Blueberries can make lovely purple poop. Lots of potatoes or lentils could make it pretty solid. There can be a lot of what I like to call "rabbit droppings", the tiny, round balls of poop like rabbits leave. During weaning, the poops can be fantastic. They start to smell a bit worse, but they are so much easier to clean up, so I think it's worth it. I've had much fewer incidents of "up the back" and "good god she needs a bath right this second". Don't worry about your baby's poop right now. It's likely to be a different colour every day.

Last word 

Try and make weaning and mealtimes fun for your baby. They are more likely to grow up fussy if you don't give them a wide diet. Let them hold another spoon whilst you feed them. Let them get messy. Don't yell. What I've been doing is praising the good and ignoring the bad. I think it works.

If you have questions you can always comment on this blog, or email me at suzi.d.cross@gmail.com. There's not much else I can think of, so any questions might be really good to keep 
this blog going. 

Baby: 3-6 months: Weaning

There's not much else I've gone through to say, so I'm probably going to only blog once a week or so from now on.

So I'm normally one to tell you don't listen to everything the health professionals tell you as gospel, but with weaning, wait until 17 weeks. We tried our little one on solids at 16 weeks and she was not interested. Exactly one week later she was much more interested about it.

Don't start your baby on baby rice. It's boring. Our little one was not bothered about it. It's one of the easiest things because its so close to her milk, but I could clearly see on her face, why am I not just getting this in a bottle? The first thing you should try her on is banana. Babies LOVE banana. It is really easy for you too, you don't need to cook it, it's cheaper than a jar, really easy to mash.

Your baby will let you know when (s)he is ready for solids. (s)he lets you know by staring at you when you eat. (s)he will watch every mouthful and (s)he starts to get really excited. (s)he may wave her arms, (s)he may open and close her mouth in time to yours. You will know when your baby is getting ready for solids. They officially advise you to start solids if they start to see a slight weight drop at the clinic, which would mean (s)he isn't getting all (s)he needs from her bottle. You will also notice that (s)he isn't satisfied by the bottle and may want more and more milk. I do not advocate using stage 2 "hungry baby" formula to stave off solids. Our parents were advised to start babies on solids at 4 months not 6, and sometimes even still started early. I think we started our baby too early on solids, however, and I would like to suggest that, once you feel your baby is ready for solids, you wait 2 weeks before you give her it.

It will of course help if you like banana, so you can finish what (s)he doesn't have. Baby food jars have really come along in recent years, but it will always be better for you to prepare her food for her, you will know exactly what's in it, no preservatives or anything

The first fall

You WILL drop your baby, or she will fall over. The first time she falls and bumps her head, it's completely heart wrenching. you feel physically sick. You don't know what to do, you want to scream. It's awful.

~*It is NOT safe to carry your baby to another room in her bouncy chair. This is how my baby first fell.*~

First things first as soon as your baby has fallen, make sure (s)he cries and breathes in to let out a massive scream. After that, take her and cuddle her, to calm her down a bit, and to calm you down. Rush straight to the hospital, in a taxi, so make sure you have the money for one hidden somewhere at all times. Do not stand around and wait for a bus, do not drive in that stressed out condition. Cuddle and jig the baby until (s)he stops crying, or at least quietens down, then call your taxi and whilst you are waiting for it, run around like a headless chicken.
Put her in her cot. Safe and secure and you need to get ready.
People will be judging you. People will be making probing questions to see if you did it on purpose. Try and replay the incident in your mind, because they will ask a lot of questions and "I don't know it happened so fast" apparently isn't acceptable.
 Make bottles up for the whole day, you will be there for hours
Bring hat, and gloves, and coat, and blankets, even if you don't normally, even if it's summer. Depending what time of day it is, you could be there past dark, and it could get really cold, even in summer.
Bring toys
Bring a book if you can. You will be there for hours, and if your baby is asleep, you will be bored
Bring your baby's red book.
Bring a pram if you can. You don't want to haul your baby all over hospital, especially if (s)he's asleep. I had a lovely taxi driver, who helped me work out how to put it down to get in his car.

Try your best not to panic, your baby will pick up on it. I got to the hospital so fast, there were no marks on her. I saw the nurse for initial assessment, and then went to the waiting room to wait for a doctor. Her bruise developed in the waiting room. I went back to the nurse and told her and she had a little look at it. Everything was fine with my baby of course, but you can never be too safe with a head injury. I think the fact that I got there so fast the bruise developed whilst I was there was heavily in my favour. They could see I got there as quickly as I possibly could.

Your baby is allowed to sleep. I don't remember why, whether it's because babies don't get concussion or because you're there with her every second, I don't know. But don't try and force your baby to stay awake. If she's relaxed enough to sleep and cuddle, then it's clearly not that painful for her, which is very very good, right?

Baby: 3-6 months: How do I play with my baby?

Carry on doing everything you did for 0-3 months (previous blog post), with a few additions and changes.

• It's time to learn to stop swearing now. It's still early, but if you start now you will be able to slip up a few times before you actually need to stop.
• It's time to find radio edits of the songs you've been playing her, and change her youtube playlist to radio edits. You can still play her your style of music but
• It's time to find kiddies songs for her. It's also something you'll need to get used to. And babies (and children) love repetition, so you need to start getting used to silly nonsense songs over and over and over and over...it's worth it for their massive grins when they recognize it though, I promise.

It is still early for these things, but if you're starting to get used to it now you'll be more prepared for later.

So I had a craving one day for a song I heard in french class, and my baby loved it! She reacted so well we've played it to her almost every day since! I don't know if it's the accent, the language, the tone, the sound effects...she loves it. And this has paved the way for very early foreign language learning. If you know another language, you should start teaching it to your children as soon as possible. The younger they are, the easier they will pick it up (I'm talking about 2years here though) She literally dances to this. Maybe your baby will like it too, maybe they won't. It's really worth a try.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v16LyAr3aZ8

and also this one

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChTEn7h1e6U&list=PL261F0CA7887756DA

Your baby may also like ANY Alvin and the Chipmunks song, because of the silly voices. My baby adores music, it seems to be her world, and with such good reactions to music, it was very easy to forget to help her develop other characteristics.

Don't forget tummy time. This helps with learning to crawl, and roll. You should try and give your baby 5 minutes tummy time every single day. Let her get frustrated. It spurs her on. Don't stop just because (s)he starts to cry. Let her cry for a few minutes first, it's okay, it won't hurt her.

Don't forget to let her grab and touch things. Use her own hand to push buttons on her toys to teach her. Dangle things from the bar on her bouncy chair or across the pram. Suddenly one day she just grabbed it by herself, and I felt really guilty that I hadn't been putting toys for her to grab, at all. keep trying to hand her things, put her fingers around them yourself, and (s)he'll look so proud of herself when she holds it, even for a second. My baby loves crinkling pop tart packets. Never leave the room if you give her something like this, because she will often break little bits off, and you will need to watch her like a hawk, or take ANY little, swallowable bits away from her. Your baby will be starting to develop her love for sound, and making the sounds herself.

Don't forget to let her sit up. A wonderful thing to do, is to put her on your bed, and put pillows behind her, roll your duvet around her sides so she can't fall to the side. (s)he will look so proud of herself when (s)he can do it "all by herself" as she gets older and more used to sitting up, you can support her less and less. You can hold her hands and sing row row row your boat. (s)he will be able to sit completely by herself at around six months, but if you practice with her, it could be earlier. Row row row your boat is so good because it repeatedly used the sitting up motion, which will strengthen her muscles. Don't expect her to sit anywhere (on your lap, on the bed, later, on the floor) for very long. Remember this is new to her and it could be hurting her muscles. Always follow long periods of sitting with cuddles or a nice lie down.

Baby: 0-3 months: How do I play with my baby?

There are lots of things you can do to play with your baby! There are SO many things you can try. Watch her, and see what (s)he does and doesn't like. Even before (s)he smiles, there's plenty of cues she gives you as to how much (s)he likes something.

My little girl didn't really care for toys until she was about 4 months old. This is fine. You can find other ways of entertaining your baby. (s)he probably still sleeps quite a lot, but when she's awake there are a lot of things you can try with her:

• You can play music to her. If you play stuff to her that you played whilst pregnant, she might even recognize it. You can play her whatever you like, your music. This is the time to see if (s)he's like you and what she likes and doesn't. You can play radio to her for a mix of new and old music, and you know it will all be bleeped, but you can find radio edits later.
• You can sing to her. Sing her whatever you want, a mix of things would be best, to see what (s)he likes, but you can swear as much as you like, (s)he doesn't understand you yet. This is all about getting comfortable singing to your baby, so you can do it in public and dance and be silly without being embarrassed, and the easiest way to do that would be to sing her music that you're comfortable with and know the words to.
• Explore her sense of touch. Run a feather along her face, show her how to rustle your empty crisp packet. If it's summery, take her playmat outside, and (s)he can lean over the edge and run her fingers through the grass, feel the wind on her little face. Also, babies love trees. They like to see them move in the breeze and hearing them rustle. 
• You can bounce her on your lap and sing her nursery rhymes. Easy to look up, or YouTube, if you can't remember all the words from your childhood. There are regional differences too so keep that in mind. 
• You can show her that baby in the mirror. They LOVE that baby in the mirror. They will smile at her, try to touch her, try to talk to her (as (s)he gets older) Say their name as they look at that baby in the mirror, it will help them associate, that's ME.
• You can read to her. My 5 month old baby is only just getting into books, but some will be into the, earlier. Try them out, and if your baby doesn't seem interested, try another time. It could be that her eyes aren't developed enough to see properly, or (s)he could simply not be in the mood for it. Reading can be very good for you, you need to talk to your baby and let her know your voice, and that you're there. Reading can be a great way to start off, because you get nervous at first, and you don't know what to say. When you're reading out loud to your baby (even the book you're currently reading if you want) (s)he is hearing your voice, and that is the most important thing. It really doesn't matter what you say.

~*Don't be afraid to be creative! Your baby will love personalized nursery rhymes, and made up stories! If you start now when they can't understand, you will be more used to it later when they ask you to, and you won't be embarrassed! These are some variations I have come up with for my little one*~

How much is that baby in the mirror?

The one with the beautiful smile?

How much is that baby in the mirror?

I do hope that baby's for sale.

Pat-a-cake pat-a-cake

Baker's man.

Bake me a cake as fast as you can

Pat it and prick it and make it gluten-free

And put it in the oven for grandma and me! 

(we're not snobs, grandma is actually coeliac, which means she's allergic to gluten)

~**I don't believe children should be shoved in front of the tv. Our parents did fine without it. "it's educational" Yes, sometimes, but not as interactive as YOU are. Not as fun, comforting, or educational as YOU + TOYS can be. Sure they like the colours, and it's cute to see them stare at it, and there IS a difference between letting them watch 2 minutes, and shoving them there for half an hour. It can make a rude little child that cranes around mommy and daddy to see the damn tv. Or cry if it's not on. I've seen it. I don't want my little one watching tv until she is at least year old. They can't understand or benefit from the tv until past then anyway, you just don't want to entertain your child. I know it's hard. I'm living it. But the BEST thing you can do for her is entertain her yourself. Please do not take offence. It is my opinion, not instruction**~

You will need to develop a constant monologue. Narrate everything you're doing: "Mummy's washing a plate, scrub scrub scrub, put it to dry, there we go!", "We're going to go change your bum, up, up, up the stairs, weeee! Okay Give me that little leggie..." Etc. This is useful because it helps your child's development of language, and understanding, if (s)he has more words being spoken to her (s)he will undoubtedly pick up the language quicker than a baby who doesn't! It is also a form of entertainment for her, and comfort. You need to learn how to be silly, and play with your little baby, and it starts here. You need to keep this monologue up pretty much always. It makes you thirsty, but you're doing the best thing for your child. 

Talk to her on the bus. It makes me sad when I see people NOT talking to their babies on the bus! When she gets a bit older (I started at four months), you can even have her in your arms on the bus, (s)he can look out the window and watch the world go by, and there's plenty of things to say! "Where are we going darling? We going on an adventure? Ooh what's that? That's a TREE, and a CAR, and a FENCE..." Anything she can see, from the pram or from your arms. (I prefer to have her in my arms, it's a cuddle, and you can talk quieter in her ear) It may be embarrassing the first few times, but most people don't give a monkey's and some people look at you with admiration and indulgence (generally older people, a lot of them new grandparents. Don't be surprised if they talk to you) 

You can get stuck for things to say to her quite often, but it's no problem. Start again, babies love repetition, or fall back on telling her how beautiful (s)he is, and how much you love her. You can talk to her about what you're going to have for dinner tonight, what time Daddy's going to be home, all sorts. If you notice yourself saying the same things over and over, it's okay. How many people have heard you saying it over and over? No-one, because people don't really care, and if they're just passing you in the street, they've heard it once. Don't get self conscious, your baby will LOVE this, I promise.

Some failsafe phrases, like how BEA-U-TI-FUL she is, repeated over and over, are so good because now our baby recognizes the word beautiful, at only 5 months old, and smiles every single time we say it. Break words down into syllables (like above) for a change of tone and pace in your monologue.

Baby: 0-3 months: 3-6 months: 6-9 months: Date night!

If you're still with the father of your baby, or if you've entered a new relationship and are living with this new person, you need to make time for dates. It is very important to have time together, especially if you're living together and you both have to deal with the daily grind of baby tasks here and there and everywhere. It is obviously best if a grandma lives fairly close to you for a no-hassle baby-sitter, but even if not you should find a friend you trust or even hire someone.

You should go out on a date with your other half about once a month. Every week is excessive, twice a month could be great, but definitely at least once every six weeks. You don't have to drink, or go to a fancy restaurant, but you should definitely get out of the house. Sure it might be nice to catch up on some recorded tv, but you can do that any evening after the baby has gone to bed. You should get out of the house, go to the cinema, go bowling, have a candlelit dinner, something you don't often get to do. You should ban any baby talk, you won't succeed, at least the first couple of times anyway, but you should have that goal in mind. It should be just you two at that table. Let the stresses of the past few weeks melt away, as you remember why you fell for each other, and what it is like to be together. Date night is something you should work into your budget, you might want to try a restaurant you've been past, you might want to recreate your first date, you might even want to go out drinking. Do not feel guilty about this. You need time together and time for yourselves. You're not just parents. You're a couple in love.

Baby: 0-3 months: The first Smilestone

Your baby will smile when (s)he is ready. Don't get upset about it, or stressed. I was so focused on wanting her to smile when daddy was around. You can't give your baby a deadline. (s)he will smile when (s)he's good and ready and there's nothing you can do about it. If (s)he smiles when Daddy is around, that's just luck. He might be upset to miss it but there are plenty of other milestones he will be there for. You also might feel like you can't leave her with anyone else in case (s)he smiles without you. You should try to get over this. Of course you'll be upset if you miss it, but it won't be the end of the world, and there'll be more to come! And if you keep delaying your date night, you will put strain on your relationship, and that will make an unhappy home environment for your little one, and (s)he might actually smile later because of it.

So how can you encourage your baby to smile? Make sure you smile a lot around her. Show her how it's done. She will pick up on it eventually. You could also gently push up the corners of her mouth with your fingertips, smiling as you do, to show her that is what (s)he's doing. You should also do things that make her happy. If (s)he has a favourite game or song, play it with her a lot. Make sure you give her a lot of attention and play. (s)he will be more likely to smile when she is calm and relaxed, or excited and playing.

But I've been told "it's wind"? Yes. Babies do give windy smiles, and they can be so beautiful and you wonder if it really is just wind. Windy smiles happen more when (s)he's asleep, so if she's awake, it could be real. I just knew in my heart that she was smiling for real. Even if it's "too early" don't listen to everyone else telling you that it's wind, listen to your mother's instinct, the voice inside. I'm sure you'll know when it's real. Have faith in yourself, you can do it.

Babies tend to smile at around 6-8 weeks. It can be before that, and it can be after. My baby smiled at 5 weeks. After the first time, of any milestone, don't expect more the same day, or the next day, it could be a couple of days before they're ready again.