I'm here, trying to advise and help. This is probably best for first-time-mums, because that's what I am :) I'm not saying that second, third, fourth time-mums can't get anything from this, but you probably know it already. I'm NOT a doctor, I'm just offering advice and personal experiences that people may or may not want to learn from. I'm possibly controversial, I don't really know to be honest, but this is just what I think is best for me and my baby. This is created with the view of a mum-to-mum chat. If you're a Daddy looking things up, be warned there may be talk of vaginas that you may not want to know.

I recommend that because you get so many things thrust at you, by the hospital, by friends and family, books, internet...I would recommend you only research your current stage, and the next one, so you have advice for what you're going through, and what's coming next, otherwise you can get confused, think your baby is ready for something that they're not. I've included a search bar where you can search for the stage you want so it won't be too confusing.

Mum to one beautiful baby girl.

Monday 2 December 2013

Newborn: Baby: 0-3 months: Safe sleeping for baby

~*I consider "newborn" to mean up to 1m*~
I am using the "safe sleep for you and your baby" gro company and fsid booklet, found at my nhs hospital, as a guide for what they tell you is correct, and my opinions on these medical "facts" You're mum. You know best. Take these strict rules they force on you with a pinch of salt, ask your parents what they did with you. Medical opinions change, so it's not all set in stone.

Whilst your baby is newborn you will definitely want her in with you. It's not 100% necessary, back in the day they didn't always sleep the babies in with the mothers, but it does increase risk of cot death if you don't sleep in with your newborn.

Advantages of sleeping in the same room as your baby:
  • Easy to soothe her when (s)he wakes in the night
  • You can hear when (s)he wakes in the night
  • It will soothe your own personal worries about all the things that might go wrong in the night
  • Easier to feed if (s)he's right next to you
  • Decreases chances of cot death
How to sleep your newborn:
>Your newborn should always have her feet at the bottom of the moses basket or cot. This way, when (s)he wriggles in the night, she is more likely to wriggle up and out of the covers, but if (s)he's at the top of the cot and wriggles down, (s)he could pull the covers up over her head and have difficulty breathing.
>"Your newborn should sleep on her back." My mum had 3 kids, and they said differently for all of us. "it is not safe for your baby to sleep on her front or side", don't worry. It's fine. For the first month it is best to follow their guidelines of sleeping on her back, but as soon as she was able to move her neck and head well, we started sleeping our angel on her front. It helps her get her wind up by herself. I don't like sleeping on back because I worry that if they vomit, they could choke on it. 
>"Your newborn should sleep in a cot or moses basket next to you, not in bed with you." I think this is right for newborns, but when they get a bit older, it's fine. If she's being especially awkward, sometimes I'll sleep in my baby's room in our spare bed. The bed is next to the wall and I'm blocking her from rolling off the other side, so I think it's fine to share my bed with her. 

"It's very dangerous to sleep together with your baby on a sofa, armchair or settee and it's also risky to sleep a baby alone in an adult bed." Okay. Let's break this down shall we? You're a mum. Naturally you're very worried about everything and you know what's best for your baby. You can nap safely with your baby in an armchair or sofa/settee. You're not going to drop her are you? You'll worry and fret and take the necessary precautions, and probably won't even get to sleep before she wakes up. It's fine. Maybe not for the first couple of weeks, but it's okay.
It's also fine to sleep a baby alone in an adult bed. Probably only double or bigger, but it's okay. You can put her down for a nap in your room, and it's okay as long as you don't leave the room. If you want to watch tv in your room or something, it's okay to let your baby sleep in your bed. If you want to leave the room this is also okay, but you should always make some kind of barricade or nest so (s)he won't wriggle or roll off the bed. Even if (s)he can't roll, you don't want her first time to cause an accident.

"Settle your baby with a dummy." Dummies are a personal choice and you might not want to ever give your baby a dummy. They shouldn't be dictating this to you. Dummies are good because it is a comfort thing, they like it. It can also be a good indicator for your baby that it's time to sleep now. If you do decide to use a dummy, remember that there are a few different types, and your baby might be spitting it out a lot because (s)he doesn't like that shape. My baby doesn't like the "dentist recommended" dummies. She has also been using 6m+ dummies since she was 3m old. It could just be too small for your baby.

Baby's room is recommended to be between 16 and 20 degrees C. Sweet spot at 18. Baby shouldn't sleep next to a radiator or window.

"Baby should sleep in with you for the first 6m". Not necessary. From 2m my baby has been in her cot bed, she wanted more space and cried when we put her in the moses basket. She's been sleeping on her own since 3m. Just get a good baby monitor. I think sleeping in with your baby that long might make them clingy and/or a bad sleeper. Trust your instincts for how long (s)he wants to be with you, and if she sleeps through the night nice and early, why would you want to sleep in with her and risk waking her with a bad dream or a snore? 
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