But she just sleeps all the time! Yes. I know. Enjoy that whilst you can. You won't, but I can tell you to anyway. Anyway, just because she's sleeping doesn't mean you can't get to know her. Get as many photos as you can, you'll be surprised how much (s)he changes and how quickly! Cuddle her, let her sleep on you and get to know you. Spend time together as a family before paternity leave ends. Take photos of you as a family. Even if (s)he's jaundiced, it can be interesting to look back on. See how tiny (s)he is and feel how amazingly heavy (s)he seems, even though everyone with older babies is telling you how light she is.Feel how strong (s)he is, and how curious. Even in the first few weeks you can pick up on some things that (s)he likes! My little one (LO in forums and chatrooms) has always been obsessed with bookshelves. I wonder if it's all the colours.
Skin to skin - this is very important. I've heard some dads say that (s)he's attention seeking to want to cuddle all day. Not at this age. The professionals say (s)he can't be crying for attention seeking until 6 months. I think it's 3. They do go through stages of being clingy, but not right now. Your mother's instinct will tell you when (s)he is starting to just want you. Right now, (s)he is getting comfort from your heartbeat that (s)he heard for all those months, and if (s)he lies on daddy too they will bond quicker and better. Skin to skin is the best way of bonding with your baby. (s)he feels safe and loved. Daddy might not like it so much when she tries to pull out his chest hair, but if he can handle it, force as much upon him as possible. And enjoy it, especially if it's a girl, they don't always like cuddles. My LO only sees it as me restraining her, and preventing her from seeing the world - she's only 4 1/2 months! I think girls are more interdependent, they seem more curious. Girls seem to toilet train easier, because they want to be able to do it themselves.
Salt baths - These will help your wounds. Try and have one a day for at least a week.
Visitors - So your place is a mess with this influx of...stuff! It's only a little baby, where did all this stuff come from?! and you're too tired to clean it up, and suddenly your house seems to be some sort of damn museum, with visits every other damn day and people trailing through your house and well meaning friends and family coming to see the new baby...it's fine. They're not expecting the place to be tidy, and some people (probably moms themselves) might offer to help you with anything you want.
Accepting help - like asking questions. You have to do it. You have to let people help you, or you'll drown. It doesn't make you a bad mom. Even now, I find it hard. Even little things like getting the damn gate, I do it every day of the week and then suddenly at the weekends there's daddy to help me! It can be strange, but I'll let you in on a little secret, you don't have to do it all! And don't be afraid to ask! Especially people like your other half, and family, if they wouldn't mind loading the dishwasher for you, locking the door for you, even things like making their own coffee and letting themselves out the house! It all helps. And don't think to yourself, or let anyone say to you, you'll have to get used to it on your own. No you don't. Partner's paternity leave has ended? There's evenings and weekends. Single mom? What about your mom, or his mom, or your friends? There's always someone there for you. Even if it's only at the end of a phone and not in person. You don't have to do this alone. You're not alone.
Skin to skin - this is very important. I've heard some dads say that (s)he's attention seeking to want to cuddle all day. Not at this age. The professionals say (s)he can't be crying for attention seeking until 6 months. I think it's 3. They do go through stages of being clingy, but not right now. Your mother's instinct will tell you when (s)he is starting to just want you. Right now, (s)he is getting comfort from your heartbeat that (s)he heard for all those months, and if (s)he lies on daddy too they will bond quicker and better. Skin to skin is the best way of bonding with your baby. (s)he feels safe and loved. Daddy might not like it so much when she tries to pull out his chest hair, but if he can handle it, force as much upon him as possible. And enjoy it, especially if it's a girl, they don't always like cuddles. My LO only sees it as me restraining her, and preventing her from seeing the world - she's only 4 1/2 months! I think girls are more interdependent, they seem more curious. Girls seem to toilet train easier, because they want to be able to do it themselves.
Salt baths - These will help your wounds. Try and have one a day for at least a week.
Visitors - So your place is a mess with this influx of...stuff! It's only a little baby, where did all this stuff come from?! and you're too tired to clean it up, and suddenly your house seems to be some sort of damn museum, with visits every other damn day and people trailing through your house and well meaning friends and family coming to see the new baby...it's fine. They're not expecting the place to be tidy, and some people (probably moms themselves) might offer to help you with anything you want.
Accepting help - like asking questions. You have to do it. You have to let people help you, or you'll drown. It doesn't make you a bad mom. Even now, I find it hard. Even little things like getting the damn gate, I do it every day of the week and then suddenly at the weekends there's daddy to help me! It can be strange, but I'll let you in on a little secret, you don't have to do it all! And don't be afraid to ask! Especially people like your other half, and family, if they wouldn't mind loading the dishwasher for you, locking the door for you, even things like making their own coffee and letting themselves out the house! It all helps. And don't think to yourself, or let anyone say to you, you'll have to get used to it on your own. No you don't. Partner's paternity leave has ended? There's evenings and weekends. Single mom? What about your mom, or his mom, or your friends? There's always someone there for you. Even if it's only at the end of a phone and not in person. You don't have to do this alone. You're not alone.
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